Deciding to become a foster parent often will finally occur after numerous thoughts, comments, or conversations that involve,“I’ve always thought about fostering….”

Finally taking the first steps toward becoming a foster parent is both exciting and intimidating.

Your heart wants to step in and do something for children and families who need love and support, while your mind is keenly aware that foster care at some level will involve brokenness, hardship, and pain, or the need would not exist. As a foster parent, your role will be to invite that brokenness into your home in ways that the majority of people around you are trying to avoid.

Whether you're just beginning to explore the idea or have already decided to move forward, understanding what lies ahead can help you navigate the journey.

The outline below is a guide to walk you through some of the basics of the process. Information is a helpful tool and necessary to becoming a skilled foster parent. However, the primary indicator of what your experience will be as a foster parent will be the spiritual self-assessment that frames how you make decisions in all areas of your life. More on that here.

There are no perfect foster parents at any stage in the game. We are all on a learning journey, and obedience to make yourself available is the first step. Your understanding of the source of wisdom, peace, love, joy in your life prior to any child entering your home is foundational. (Proverbs 2:1-11). See blog for further discussion.

The Path to Becoming a Fostear Parent

Step 1: Self-Assessment

There are no perfect foster parents, but in order to best care for children and manage the high’s and low’s of walking with a child and family through their time in foster care, it helps to ask yourself a few questions:

Why do you want to foster? Understanding your motivations will help sustain you through challenges and make placement decisions.
What age group, needs, or number of children can your family realistically support? Consider your home environment, work schedule, existing family dynamics and other children in the home.
What resources and support systems do you have in place? Think about your community connections, family support, and capacity for handling stress.
What fears or concerns do you have? Acknowledging these early helps you address them proactively and ask appropriate questions during the licensing process.
What are your unrealistic expectations? Think about where your understanding of the system, the children who need help, or family outcomes might be based on stories, movies, or assumptions and where you might need more information.

This is also the time to research local agencies, attend information sessions, and speak with experienced foster parents to gain perspective. There are SO many ways to help with foster care. Take the time to ask questions and find out the best role for you.

Step 2: Choosing an Agency

Each state manages the foster care aspect of their child welfare system a little differently. Kansas is unique in that it is "privatized" which means that the Department of Children and Families (DCF) contracts with selected private agencies to handle case management for children in foster care in different counties. The child placement agency who handles the child’s case management does not need to be the same agency a foster parent chooses for their licensing agency they will work with. The Missouri Department of Social Services (DSS) - Children’s Division is the primary state agency responsible for licensing foster parents and overseeing foster care. DSS along with other along with numerous private agencies, can license foster parents.

While the state agencies oversee the foster care system, as a foster parent you work directly with a licensing and support agency of your choice. When selecting an agency, consider:

The support services they offer (training, case management, crisis intervention)
The experiences of other foster parents with the agency
Geographic proximity and accessibility
The other services they provide for families in child welfare

Is it okay to ask questions of each agency about how they support their families. Think about issues that are important to your specific family. For example:

How do you help with child placement decisions in my home?
How do you support the religious beliefs of foster families?
What does your after hours support look like?
How long are most foster family support workers employed with your agency? How frequently do homes get new workers?
In what ways do you support a family to help find respite? How often do you encourage respite for your families?

Many prospective foster parents find value in speaking with several agencies before making a decision. You can also ask if they provide foster family mentors or connections with veteran foster homes.

Step 3: Basic Requirements to become licensed

Be at least 21 or older
Be able to meet basic income guidelines
Be free from any type of assistance including, but not limited to, Section 8 Housing, food stamps, TANF, or Medicaid
Be able to provide adequate bedroom space that meets local fire codes and have a separate bed for each child
Have reliable transportation
Be willing to complete 30 hours of free training in Model Approach for Partnerships in Parenting (MAPP) Foundations for Kansas and similar courses in other states (STARS in Missouri)
Agree to use non-physical discipline for children
Be willing for everyone in your household to undergo complete background checks and fingerprinting

Step 4: Initial Application

Once you've selected an agency, you'll complete an application that typically includes documents to show you can meet the requirements outlined above.

Basic demographic information
Employment history
References
Health information
Information about your home environment
Background checks

While these processes may feel invasive, remember they exist to ensure children are placed in safe environments.

Step 4: Home Study

The home study is a comprehensive assessment of your family and home environment. Your agency can work with you to complete the home study while you are also completing the required training classes. The home study typically involves:

Home inspections: Ensuring your home meets safety standards (working smoke detectors, secure medications, adequate space, etc.)
Individual and family interviews: Discussing your background, childhood, relationship history, parenting philosophy, and expectations
Documentation review: Verifying financial stability, health status, and references
Family assessment: Evaluating how fostering will impact your family system as well as review of the ages, experiences, and needs of children you will be best equipped to foster.

It can be hard not to view the home study as an examination to "pass.” It’s best to think of it as a collaborative process to determine if fostering is right for your family and what supports you might need to be successful. The questions are all there as a result of an issue that someone in the years of foster care before you experienced, so even this process is a helpful part of the journey.

The walk through of your home may identify areas of the home that are considered “unsafe” for the state regulations. For example, windows must be a certain height from the floor; stair rails must be a particular width; pools must have fencing or a variety of other requirements per state. Your case worker will help you identify these and create a plan on how to fix them. There are non-profits who may be available with providing some of the needed items such as fire extinguishers, or small repairs.

Step 5: Training and Education

Both Kansas and Missouri require pre-service training for foster parents. While specific requirements vary by state and agency, training typically covers:

Understanding trauma and its effects on children's development and behavior
De-escalation techniques and behavior management strategies
Working with birth families and supporting reunification
Navigating the child welfare system
Cultural competency and meeting the needs of diverse children
Documentation and reporting requirements

Training for CPR and First Aid is also required. Beyond required training, seek out additional educational opportunities through organizations like Joy Meadows and other foster care support groups or trauma-training.

Step 6: Completion of Licensing

After completing the above steps, your agency will submit your home study and documentation for final approval. This process may take several weeks as your file undergoes review by the state licensing agency, and for background check and fingerprinting review to be processed.

Once approved, you'll receive a foster care license specifying:

The number of children you can foster
Age ranges approved
Any special needs classifications
The duration of your license (typically 1-2 years before renewal)

This blog post is part of our Foster Care 101 series, designed to provide guidance and encouragement for those considering or beginning their foster care journey. If you have questions about becoming a foster parent or want to connect with resurces in your area, reach out to Joy Meadows at info@joymeadows.org.